What to Do in the First Week After a Parent Dies
Losing a parent is hard enough without a list of tasks. But a few things do need to happen in the first days, and knowing what can wait is just as important. Here's a simple guide. Take it one step at a time, and lean on your family.
The first day or two
- Get a legal pronouncement of death. If your parent died in a hospital or hospice, staff handle this. If at home without hospice, call 911.
- Call the funeral home. If your parent had pre-arrangements, start there. The funeral home will guide you through the next steps and help order death certificates.
- Tell close family and friends. Ask one or two people to help spread the word so it isn't all on you.
- Secure the home, car and pets. Lock up, collect mail, and make sure any pets are cared for.
Later in the first week
- Order several certified death certificates. Banks, insurers and agencies each want one. Ten is a common number.
- Find the will and any instructions. Look for a will, trust, a letter of wishes, or a family binder. Check the safe, desk and filing cabinet.
- Contact their attorney if they had one, or find an estate attorney near you. They'll explain whether probate is needed.
- Call Social Security (the funeral home often does this for you) and their former employer or pension.
- Look for life insurance. Check papers, bank statements for premium payments, and their employer. Each company needs a claim filed.
What can wait
Selling the house, sorting belongings, closing most accounts and filing taxes can all wait a few weeks or longer. Don't let anyone rush you into big decisions.
Why this is so hard
The hardest part for most families is simply not knowing where things are. One family we know spent more than two years settling an estate, and kept uncovering accounts and papers nobody knew existed.
That's why we built The Family File: so your own children don't have to go through this. You answer simple questions, and it prints everything into one binder for your safe. Our first 100 families get it free. Learn more at getfamilyfile.com.
This is general information, not legal advice. Every state and situation is different; an estate attorney can help with yours.